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  2. "A SOURCE OF INNOCENT MERRIMENT."

    Jack Sprat could eat no fat; His wife could eat no lean But they smoked each others cigarettes, And murmured. "Thanks, Old Bean.'" ...

    Article : 28 words
  3. COULDN'T HAVE BEEN SOBER.

    MAGISTRATE (to diminutive prisoner): "There is no use your denying that you struck the policeman, and that you were drunk." ...

    Article : 50 words
  4. HIS MISTAKES.

    WEARY and worn and sad, the young man who was prematurely grey, crawled into the registrar's office. "Are you quite sure." he asked desperately, ...

    Article : 71 words
  5. GIVING HIM A LESSON.

    HE had been married about a year, and had taken to spending his evenings up West with the boys. One night his conscience worried him, and he thought he would phone his ...

    Article : 147 words
  6. NO ROOM.

    Author of Low's celebrated cartoons in the London " Star." ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 12 words
  7. HOW THE PALMIST KNEW.

    BREATHLESSLY she waited for the palmist's words. "Ah! I see by your hand that you are engaged to be married," said the palmist. ...

    Article : 120 words
  8. CHANGED HER MIND.

    TT was an Irish girl of whom the story is told that she refused to marry a most devoted lover until he had amassed' a fortune of £1000. After some expostulation he accepted ...

    Article : 111 words
  9. A FLY IN THE OINTMENT.

    "WELL, James, how are you feeling to-day?" asked a minister of a gouty parishioner. "I'm a bit upset, sir." said the old man sadly. "1've been unfortunate to-day." "In what way?" ...

    Article : 114 words
  10. WHICH?

    TWO men were wandering through a country churchyard examining the quaint tomb-stones. "Look here," said one, "here's a queer one; ...

    Article : 49 words
  11. THE REAL THING.

    A PROHIBITION speaker in an American town had provided himself with a glass of milk for refreshment daring his oration. Unobserved, a wag poured out half the milk ...

    Article : 70 words
  12. THE SAME ENDING.

    "YES," said the prospective buyer, "I alway judge a motor-car by its engine." "But don't you pay any attention to its finish?" asked the seller, who had been ...

    Article : 51 words
  13. A REVELATION.

    THESE modern French fashions,": said Lady Duff-Gordon, "reveal many beautles, but they also reveal many defects. "A young schoolmarm, dressed in a skirt ...

    Article : 78 words
  14. HIGH EXPLOSIVE.

    A RETURNED warrior was relating his experiencea to a number of old friends in the village inn. After exhausting his supply of tales, he was asked:— ...

    Article : 74 words
  15. THE CAVITY.

    A DENTIST called to see a friend, and they both chatted away for a time, and then smoked their pipes in silence for a while. Presently the friend remarked: "My head ...

    Article : 59 words
  16. HIS CONCERN.

    "SYBIL" the youth softly whispered to her, "I am going to tell you something: I do not know just how you will receive it, but hope for the best. For some time it has been ...

    Article : 95 words
  17. HIS SYMPATHY.

    THE little boy sobbed bitterly as he gazed at the old man who had slipped down. The latter was touched at this show of sympathy on the part of the child. ...

    Article : 75 words
  18. UP-TO-DATE.

    THE master of the bouse heard a violent ringing and knocking at his door in the middle of the night. He came down, shivering and with his teeth chattering. On opening the ...

    Article : 70 words
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