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. TAI*K OH 'CHANGE.
?' One'of tlie ctmrmg'ofbroadcasitiBg tvire^
less seems to l»e its delightful unexpected
ness, Che .possibility that anything way
happen iu democracy. It keeps tbe
farmer posted as to the 'latest' market
quotations, and tile' talk. t>f . the bazaars
must seem trivial to the lover of -music,
say, who. has his soul as -weHasliis ear
"glued to tlie listener." He canrfot, as
-with the phone, reprove' with aa. intem
perate, "Here, I've got the Hhe. wha\, are\
you butting in for?" and as fi foreign'
musical friend of mine used to say in
moments of material depression, "Coui
merce no damn good jtode artist."
And now from oat the aerial din ,
]]' Travitore'i notes ate beard.
Like music of some distant bird
The.y penetrate tbe etber thin.
TJie. other stars all cease to spin.
They thr^.v. their orpits out of gear,
And pause a while to listen-in.
Uncompromising robust thud*
Break up tlie sweeter, softer theme.
And spoil the .glamour of the dream.
The song, no more tlie etber floods,
Its rhythm kicks, its notes are duds.
Iconoclasts bare intervened
To quote the price of oats and spuds.
We have indeed good reason to rejoice
in the news that the cultivation of'poanu^s
in the Northern Territory is prospering.
One of Australia's greatest problems is
practically solved. If 6,000,000 Australians
cannot eat sufficient peanuts to populate
the Northern Territory thickly they are
poor patriots. We should eat peanuts first
thing in the morning and last thing at
night. We should eat them at work, in
tram and train, and at grand opera.
Every citizen, as a matter of public
duty, should visit the nearest zoolo
gical gardens at least once a week.
-give up golf for one afternoon-and
feed the animals with peanuts. On the
virtues of peanuts lecturettes should be.
given in every theatre before the rise of
the curtain. Every Australian at .home
and abroad, particularly overseas, should
become an enthusiastic canvasser for the
peanut. Everywhere he goes a patriotic
Australian should have an ample supply of
peanuts, and should courteously, but firmly,
press samples upon his fellow-travellers.
By these means we should undoubtedly
succeed not only in peopling the Northern
Territory - but iu making it a rich asset to
the Commonwealth. Think of the joy and
pride we taxpayers shall feel a few years
hence when the Federal Treasurer an
nounces that thanks to the enormous con-:
sumption of peanuts he is able to do away
with the income tax. By eating one pound
.of.peanuts a-day. we may not only keep the
tax collector away, but pay off the -national
debt.
One would like to hear -the version of the
6hark, the real sea shark, not the land
shark, upon tliis aspect of the high -cost of
Jiving. We are told that young shark,
gummy,- is- sold as Murray cofl and
other fish. If that is the case
the^ shark, has a genuine 'grievance
against fishermen and fish, vendors.
Is it any wonder that he takes
the choicest schnappcr just before it is'
hauled into the boat after -having been
hooked from the reef below? In effect the'
shark says, "So long, as you eat our young
population we will continue to prey upon
you." Then another question arises;-Is it
because we eat so much shark that other
tfsh is so dear? It may be because we "do
not eat enough whale blubber or seal. The
problems contributing to the high cost of
living are BO complex that it is necessary
to regard them from different angles. -For
instance, one wonders whether apples jire
so dear in Australia because at the Empire
Exhibition cooking apples liave been .sold as
eating apples at high prices. One thing,
however, is quite clear, and that is Hurt at
this season of the year vegetables are always
dear, either because there has been 110 rain
or because rain lias been plentiful. It is re
freshing to be quite positive on at least one
point.
Not once, but twice, in our fair civic story.
lUs local valour shirked the path to glory.
Which is another way of saying that for
the- second time on record a shire council
in Victoria has repeatedly failed to induce
some ratepayer to take the vacant seat at
its council table. Naturally, municipal law
never thought of such a contingency, and
has no provision to cover it, so the council
has no other resource than to go on de
claring and inviting; while all the qualified
coldly shake their heads and declare
nothing ? doing." Surely there must be
some hidden string of some sort tied to
such an unusual complication in self
abnegation. It is-all wondrous-.strange.
Fame trumpets, beckon*, coaxes, all "in vain,
» for no one stops to listen to its toot; '
Where doty seems at most an ornate phrase,
Ambition lialts -both .manacled juad 'route
80 Fame, impatient, rtamjig ber.pretty foot.
And toots again the while she's waiting for
Tfte day some -patriot may -proclaim himself
In rolling syllable*-"A, Councillor."
In multitude JCA councillors, they
Is wisdom-useful there as"everywhere;
But Wisdom feehche hasn't half -a -show
Wiih that reproachful, ever vacant chair.
Is there no Hampden of this rustic.burgh,
For.sake of civic-.pride-not gain,, nor pelf,
To rise and ~beard the. mayor ln .hia den.
And vow he'll never stultify himself?
Have power and place sod 'possum robes DO pull
No siren's song to charm some listening ear,
The A.N.A. no longer those, cadets
Who need some practice-tor tbe higher sphere.
- Not one. How times have -dunged and tongues
are tied.
And lockjaw smitten .our too modest race.
Poor Fame confounded, murmurs to herself,' '
"This is a most extraordinary case." .
In being ordered back to work after
losing a fortnight's wages the tram
strikers claim that at any rate
theirs was the victory. On the hard
facts )t seems to show that after all the
Strikers must be commended for tWir
rooderation.because so very Iittkpleasea:
tWm. Tlieir viciory reealls thc case of
'an old friesu}. wlto some years ago under
took to* oart.-goods.to a new. gold ruBh.
Part of ttaloading was a goat, which was
run. over' and, killed en route, and for
which the owners claimed a guinea com
pensation. On the advice of his mate*
the carter consulted a lawyer about it
in fact, to make lure, he consulted two of
-them, and both advised him to pay for the
goat. "You see, you fellows were all
?wrong," lie said triumphantly to his
mates, "and I was right, because I knew
I'd have to pay.4' Hi was. so pleased, .in
deed, that lie never ceased boasting about
having j>aid three guineas where the claim
'wag only one/. The application to the
tram strikers differs only that in this case
the same persons played the carter-and
the--goat.
The . finest platform spcech we have heard
from a public man for many a day was,
in my opinion, made by Mr. Beardmore,
M L.A., honorary Minister of the Peacock
Government, at Warragul, on Saturday.
Mr. Beardmore said: "I am the father of
eight sons,-and I may as well be frank and
say that there are six daughters also." The
faithful recorder of the .occasion adds in
brackets ("laughter"). Personally, I don't
sec any reason why there should be
("laughter"), but I do see every reason
why there should be ("cheers"). I see fur
ther reason why Mr. Beardmore should be
a salaried Minister of the Crown instead of
an honorary one. And if at the impending
gcheral election Bcnainbra does not trium
phantly return Mr: Beardmore to a more
profitable office than his present one, then
the voice of the country-and I say it with
calm deliberation-will be entitled to no
more respect titan if it were a hiccup or a
stutter-Put your ("laughter") where you
like, hut for the Beardinores now and
always ("loud cheers").
These remarks were heard a few clays ago
in the train, the Sydney tram. "This
tram strike," said one of them, "must
be- rather a serious thing for Melbourne
in trouble and loss of time!" "Oh, I
! don't tliink so," answered the other; "I'vc.i
jievcr been tliere, but from what I've
heard it may mean a little trouble yet
no lost time. They can walk as fast as
the trams go over there."
Talk of suiting the theme to the occa
| sion. bandmasters have sometimes an
^almost inspired hunch in that way. I
remember years ago that on a vice-regal
[ visit to 'Ballarat-the Governor, not
Wooniera,. was. paying the visit-it rained"
.and rained as if it meant to go on for
.quite forty days and forty nights, unci raise
the waters above the adjacent heights of
Warrenhcip. And in the thick of it the
City Baud marched down Sturt street
'valiantly tooting, "Wait Till the Clouds
"Roll By." In the procession on Eight
Eight Hours Day, a few weeks ago,
| which incidentally was also the first
day of the tram strike, one of the
bauds played, "Work, Boys, Work, andj
Be Contented." As far as I know it
jhas not. yet been declared black or thrown
but of the "movement."
[ The one thing that has pained me in
-the discussion on Sabbath observance is
the suggestion that under the rose golfers
[ are the chief offenders, because golf is
such a Scotch, game. In fact it is so
vei-y Sootch that hearing them play I've j
wondered whether it was a game at ail,'
or - just a dialect. When the golfer,
speaks of "laying him a stymie," you
naturally wonder whether he is betting
or putting. My view is that the con- ]
fusion has arisen through a misreading of
the commandment. The golfer's version
may be, "Remember the Sabbath day to
keep it holey."
WOOMERA.
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