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A bush poem entitled "Waltzing Matil- da" is all the rage here just now, says the "N.Q. Herald," and some clever fellow has   managed to fit the quaint trifle with an exceedingly catchy air. "Waltzing Matil-

da," it may be explained for the benefit of the uninitiated means the same thing as "Humping Bluey," otherwise carrying a   swag, and jumbuck, as most people are aware, means in blackfellow's lingo a sheep. The music of the song has not been printed yet, but that omission will be rectified   shortly.   WALTZING MATILDA. Once a jolly swagman camped on a billa-   bong, Under the shade of a coolibah tree;   And he sang as he watched his old billy boiling—   "You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with me." Chorus. Waltzing Matilda, Matilda, my darling, You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with me; And he sang as he watched his old billy boiling— "You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with     me."   Down came a jumbuck to drink at the waterhole,     Up jumped the swagman and grabbed him with glee;   And he sang as he stowed him away in his tucker bag—   "You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with me." Down came the squatter riding a thorough- bred,     Down came the p'licemen, one, two, and three, Whose is the jumbuck you've got in your   tucker bag?   "You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with me." Up jumped the swagman, sprang into the waterhole,   Drowning himself 'neath the coolibah tree; And his ghost can be heard as he sings through the billabong—   "You'll come a-waltzing, Matilda, with me."

Attorney (for the defence) : "Now, what time was it when you were at- tacked ?" Complainant: "I don't know;     ask your client—he took my watch."   "Do you attach any credence to the   theory that men are developed from mon- keys ?" said Willie Wishington. "I think   that some are," said Miss Cayenne. "The   others appear to have remained station- ary." Tommy : "Tell me a story, uncle ?''   Uncle : "A Story ? But I don't know   what to tell you a story about." Tommy:   "Oh, tell me a story about a little boy who   had a good uncle who gave him a shil- ling.'' Lady Customer : "My little boy wishes   for a Noah's Ark. Have you one ?" Toy- man: "No, mum—no. We've given up         keeping Noah's Harks since the school board come in. They are considered too denominational, mum." On the Village Green—Amateur Bowler (to umpire) : '"Here, I say ! I can't see the wicket. How can I bowl him ?" Umpire : "Fire away. If you 'it 'im in front it's   'leg before.' If you 'it him behind, it's a   wide.' " Mrs. Hauskeep : "Yes, my new girl for-   merly worked for Mrs. De Style. She claims she left there of her own accord, but I think she was discharged." Mrs. Kaul : "What makes you think so ?"' Mrs. Hauskeep : "I judge so from certain things she's let fall since she's been here." Mrs. Kaul : "What were they ?" Mrs. Hauskeep : "[?]"