That the shortage article in last issue lost this scurrilous sheet a sub-
That the Cottesloe potentate with- drew his patronage from the ruffians who put him in their paper.
That he now restricts his read-
ing to the ''Morning Gibney" and the
That a wife-walloping wowser is in bad odor with the holy.
That they called round for him to chant ".The Lord is a Spirit."
That they found him full to the fore- head with another sort of spirit.
That the Geraldton grass-widower
flings his free limb about too public-
That his tall stories about church-
ing Number 2 are profusely sprinkled
That he doesn't take into account the wife he left in Victoria.
That lacrosse is having some of the
edges knocked off it by recent recruits. That one or two of the bli"*-me push '.rend the air with choice Billingsgate.'
That a plain-clothes peeler could pas ; occasional visits to Mrs. Tracey's do
' niara with profit.
. That the Highgate Hill grass-widow ' er has been riding for a heavy fall,
i "That .nasty rumours are afloat con
cerning the condition of one of "hi
. That the only lawful learnt son» thing, and is. now heading-for th Leeuwin.. ,
TJhat .liquid inspection might be es tended '>yith Advantage to sonteihin
That some of the bottled , stout sci -ved out -would corrode the intestuw ; of a^-swaddy. . ,
That a Murray^strfiet barmaid rinf
? in. ' glassrWitsh" on the tmsuspectir
:? . That vtlie Midland Junction ladic
j. waitijog-room disgractís «vea theGoç
j' ¿That the smell and general vcas&a
liness of ibo contraption would. . d ..^ayfc^ai. bfcíckB* ¿amp..
[ That George.: «bauld ,be made
Âtpenf^^a.:'.:^tîg-ht'.ïii: the stinkeryto sèïi lv¿lá' pc&rcs... ' -,-'
j That a roads lipard rajah has be
.shaking in his shoes .since last Sa
j Thaii^the penalty'for hbíding an. '<
fice of profit is sharp and sudden.
, ; That bis rancorous rival is tryi ^..^.a .l^'fi^im. <m tie' feyctsf i v That a crumpled-haired clerk is g ting himself disliked by his fell ¡'|jap^-étein¿s- \'..?.??.?/..-?' -'.; ,; VlTbjV^success in intrbduci
.dKckieè into his sanctum is ferocio
That the ötfaer>, omchüsj iian't ; traci even, one bird vof "the -feather, . 'That . tile Stíiih%Tstre¿t soiled-Jo *bte; is in ïor -'|i';::iiéw..^aij'o£.;^j^ 'S-. /That. ? ;th¿; new: i'^^SS^bBM^-^iiilö 1t$'- 'run-;i|ijngs. on - ^nrn-^né^OíJ^é^.
That ^e casual seeker after aux * require io produce /hip ca3^^U>¥Í¿i -^Thal-v ,-hé'5.1^vbe - esqjuireä : "into
evil establishment by -liveried flunkè
That1 & friskynight-watchman mij give jmore attention \ to. his toil.
That "making - goo-goo eyes at . lOon bar tdrlies is üot what be's T>
!ÍOIV;.'"' ., .. -'s jif' That ¿he public are getting dead
tired., of the .musicians' mîs-op. K !
j That the fiddle-scrapers' feud is al-
most as big a bore as the political
I situation. . '.-:':\v;i 1 That someone -would do a public benefit by clouting them with a cor- net. - " '.. -V" ? -.;
That an ex-3H"inïstêr. of the Crown has removed his old boastings.
I That the unhandsome private mem- oir's salary, will not run threepenny [ Junket. ? :~ ??:..;>. ; r That a three-ha'penny poisonery is
?:to be opened for the benefit of tem porarily embarrassed Laborists.
That the so-called hand-reading madam of fame has precipitately Raised her chargés. , v
That sighting a presumptive ; mug from Mulgaland, she asked .twelve and sixpence.
. That the miserable imposture should be terminated by police intervention.
, That the soliciting /she is becoming a greater nuisance "than ever.
That her constant patrol bf the central VeUing-ton-street block is a
That strict supervision by the po- lice would merit the thanks of most women folk-even the W.C.Î.U.
That a snob of the morning press is bulging visibly of late with his un- paralleled conceit.
? That his chest measurement is out of all proportion to his brain reposi-
That a nest of particularly vicious thieves has lately settled at the port.
That they are awaiting the return of the goldfields crook to bring oft a sensational coup.
That the stopgap Ministry is threat- ened with strenuous opposition at the
That the dissolution or no dissolu- tion issue should be introduced into
That the man who favors prolong- ing the present agony deserves tô be violently dropped.
That the opening of the Bunbury brewery' produced some rare efforts oí
That a stout bumble and an ink distributor cleared away from all other competitors.
That the alderman struggled home on the post by a swallow.
That a William-street snip has a cute eye for a chicken.
That he brightens up the dreary intervals of spruiking by ogling the girleens.
That the frisky titters send back many an unfilial wink at the amorous
That a suburban firm of sawmillers are slow in weighing in with over-
That some of the drivers are com- mencing to think they'll never get their gaunce.
That the absent-minded crowd will
probably wake up before the Arbitra- tion Court gets going.
/hat the Labor supporters are out in earnest for the scalp of Bason.
That the Dohenyites will muster in
full foree at the fateful ballot.
That the doings of a West End House one night last week awak-
ened numerous slumberers.
That a standing-down jockey was one ot the principal actors in the
That the rending ol furniture and female hysteria awakened all but thc slumbrous police.
j That the early closing inspector i takes his rest on Saturday nights.
That glaring breaches meet the [ ordinary, «ye at ererK tura*
.*^^£&s«¿Éi»í?-S¡> sir'.* >i.->"~