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  2. Advertising

    {No abstract available}

    Advertising : 1,303 words
  3. SHE DOEST[?]

    Susie: Papa, what makes a man always give a woman an engagement: ring? Her Father; The woman. ...

    Article : 26 words
  4. HUMOUR.

    Patrice: 1 hope you are not marrying him solely for his money? Clemence: I hope not; but that is the only thing I'm sure of. ...

    Article : 580 words
  5. A BETTER ARRANGEMENT.

    "They say it bringe luck, if you have a horseshoe over the door." "I'd rather have a motor, car in front of it." ...

    Article : 28 words
  6. REDUCING IT TO COLD PROSE.

    Teacher (reading): Let down your sable shade, O night, And add this sad earth from your sight. ...

    Article : 49 words
  7. SPEED THE PASSING GUEST.

    Guest (to hostess, who hates getting up early): I'm so awfully sorry to have dragged you up at this unearthly hour, but I had to catch the 8.30 train. ...

    Article : 59 words
  8. MAMMA WAS SHOCKED.

    Daughter: Mr. Huggins asked me to marry him last night. Mother: And What did you say? Daughter: I told him to ask you. ...

    Article : 52 words
  9. A CRUSHER.

    Mrs. Uppish: Just think—it is just six months ago that we moved away from next door to you. We are in a much better neighbourhood now! ...

    Article : 62 words
  10. AFTER THE HONEYMOON.

    She: "After six weeks of married life, Arthur, I have reached the sad certainty that you do not love me." Arthur: "My dear." ...

    Article : 60 words
  11. ROSE TO THE OCCASION.

    A. cottager's wife was once telling a friend about her "courtin days," and said. "When my man an' me was engaged 'e insisted on buying me a ...

    Article : 101 words
  12. HIS DANCE.

    Miss Smythe (organising, a subscription dance): "I'm in despair about our dance, Mr. Brown. So many people have failed me. You'il come, won't ...

    Article : 96 words
  13. THOROUGHLY EXPERIENCED.

    Customer: Have you got a got a good cut[?] Tailor: Rather, sir; he's been a barber. ...

    Article : 21 words
  14. RIVAL CABBIES.

    The proprietors of two rival livery stables, situated alongside each other in a busy street, have been having a lively advertising duel lately. ...

    Article : 114 words
  15. A CHOICE OF EVILS.

    Tommy (dressed for evening party): Mother, shall I wash my hands or put on gloves? ...

    Article : 19 words
  16. THE NEXT BEST THING.

    "Have you ever dreamt you were m heaven, Bobby?" "No. But I once dreamt that I was in a jam tart [?]" ...

    Article : 38 words
  17. NO LUCK!

    "Was his failare absolute?" "Absolute! Why, he tried suicide without success!" ...

    Article : 19 words
  18. BUT SHE BROKE IT GENTLY.

    White as the driven snow, and trembling like an agitated blancmange, Cecilia, the new housemaid, burst into the drawing-room. ...

    Article : 120 words
  19. A CLOSE SHAVE.

    Smith (to milkman): I'll have to ask you to chalk it up. Milkman (abstractedly): Oh, that's been attended to—er—beg your pardon; ...

    Article : 39 words
  20. INVERSE RATIO.

    Small Boy (suddenly): What are horses made of, Uncle? Uncle: Oh—flesh and blood, of course. Small Boy: I thought they were made ...

    Article : 40 words
  21. PRESENCE OF MIND.

    Bridget (to lady receiving calls): The landlord is at the door, mum. Lady: Very well, Bridget. (To callers.) Excuse me one moment, please; ...

    Article : 53 words
  22. THE IRISH WAY.

    Year after year my grandfather would declare that no power on earth would induce him to pay his income tax. The collector, a soft spoken, ...

    Article : 1,175 words
  23. NOT HAPPILY EXPRESSED.

    Guest: It's still raining! I'm afraid I'll have to inflict myself on you a little longer. Host (cheerfully): Oh, never mind, ...

    Article : 48 words
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