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  2. THE PROMPTINGS OF AFFECTION.

    "Charley, dear," said young Mrs. Tor kins, "I am going to learn how to back horses." "What for?" ...

    Article : 42 words
  3. WOULDN'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.

    It was a village post office. As in many villages, the office was also a general shop. It had, in fact, been the shop of the village but within a few months a ...

    Article : 219 words
  4. HUMOUR. UNHAPPILY PUT.

    "Now, tell me all the wandal that's happened since I've been away, Gas." "There's been no scandal since you've been away, Maud." ...

    Article : 27 words
  5. A BISHOP'S HUMOUR.

    It does not lessen the dignity of Phillip Brook's memory to learn from his biographer that he had an abounding sense of humour—humour that crops out in a ...

    Article : 153 words
  6. A SURE SIGN.

    Wifey: How amazing! I've forgotten to buy something I wanted. Hubby: I thought as much when you said you had some money left. ...

    Article : 27 words
  7. LATE FOR BREAKFAST.

    Mother: Didn't you hear the alarm clock? Johnny: Yes, ma[?] bot it kept on ringing so long it sent me to sleep again. ...

    Article : 28 words
  8. HER FIRST PROPOSAL.

    Madge: Was she glad when he told her the old, old-story? Marjorie: Of course slip was. Why, that girl had never heard it before. ...

    Article : 30 words
  9. AN INDULGENT RULER.

    "I think Fm not hird to" get along with." "Faith, nayther am I, mum! Whin, a misthrcss is doin her best, 'tis mesilf that overlooks lots uv things." ...

    Article : 32 words
  10. A COLLECTION THAT FAILED.

    Not very many years ago, in a country church, the rector, preaching with great carnestness for home missions, took for his text, "Feed me with food convenient ...

    Article : 192 words
  11. LECKTS LOQUACITY.

    The late Mr. Lceky's flucnce as a talker and speaker was remarkable. "M. A.P." says that in the House of Commons he was a terror to the reporters' ...

    Article : 253 words
  12. LACHRYMAL AMELIORATION.

    "Poor thing, does she take her husband's death much to heart?" "Why she's prostrated with grief. She can't see a soul except the dressmaker." ...

    Article : 28 words
  13. AN IMPOSTOR.

    Blind Bill (who had just received a copper): "Thankee, sir; thankee. I noo as you wouldn't fergit the poor blind man d'rectly I see yer come around the ...

    Article : 33 words
  14. OFF FOR THE HONEYMOON.

    She: Now George, dear, let us act so that no one will know we have been married. He: All right, just carry this ...

    Article : 33 words
  15. STILL SHE WAS NOT APPEASED.

    Freddy: Pa said you looked an object when you were bathing auntie. Auntie (with a shriek): What? Preddy. (reassuringly): But he said a ...

    Article : 42 words
  16. AN IRISHMAN'S REASONING.

    In an Irish farming community lived a certain son of the Green Isle who was particularly fond of sausages. He was not always careful to observe Friday by ...

    Article : 191 words
  17. HIS MISTAKE.

    She (learning poker): Now, if you held my hand, what would you do? He: Oh. I'd make a bluff that I was holding something good. ...

    Article : 37 words
  18. A SUSPICIOUS CHARACTER.

    An amusing mistake occurred lately in a tramway car. A woman loaded with bundles had found a vacant seat. Her umbrella, which had a kind of shepherd's ...

    Article : 276 words
  19. OFTEN THE CASE.

    She: I think the average husband judges other women by his wire. He: Yes, and I think the average wife judges her husband br the worst things ...

    Article : 36 words
  20. OLD MAN TURNS.

    "Father," said the youth, "I want some money for another Turkish bath." "Look here," said the old man, "Do vou think I'm going to keep you in hot ...

    Article : 36 words
  21. EVIDENCE.

    The Judge: You say your wife hit you over the head with a plate? Rastus: Yes, sah. But your head doesn't show it. ...

    Article : 30 words
  22. POSSESSED.

    Father: I wonder what's the matter with Nellie this evening? She acts like one possessed. Sister: She probably is I noticed a new ...

    Article : 38 words
  23. NEGLECTED TO TELL THE BULL.

    A certain American colonel, noted for the dignity of his demeanour and pride of family prestige, known all around the countryside as Colonel Ford, not long ...

    Article : 300 words
  24. THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS.

    Mrs. Manning: Do you know I hate a liar? Aunt Hannah: And yet, Mary, how sweetly you smiled when Mr. Soper ...

    Article : 38 words
  25. THE RIGHT TIME.

    When the seventh child had accosted nae for "the right time," I thought the right time had come to find it out. It was a good opportunity for setting my ...

    Article : 1,324 words
  26. A HEAVENLY MATCH.

    Elderly Husband (irritably): It isn't a year since you said you believed our marriage was made in heaven, and yet you order me around as if I wag nobody. ...

    Article : 45 words
  27. THE CARD PLAYING WOMAN.

    Women ar-re not what they were. The women I see to-day ar-re not th' same women I knew a hundhred years ago or more whin I was on th' turf. They're ...

    Article : 949 words
  28. A LIVING NECESSITY.

    She: It is trite that Miss Richleigh has money, but she is also very exacting. If you marry her, you will have to give up smoking and drinking. ...

    Article : 49 words
  29. A SURE SIGN.

    Tourist: I judge from the way that fellow was sweeting that he must have been quite angry. Westerner: No, he was just a trifle ...

    Article : 44 words
  30. RATHER GAVE HIM AWAY.

    Fond Father (showing off his offspring's intelligence): Now, Elsie dear, what is a cat? Elsie: Dunno. ...

    Article : 47 words
  31. Advertising

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    Advertising : 5 words
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