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  2. APAGE OF FUN Enjoying the Show.

    "I wonder if the baby is covered. It's cold to-night." "Of course, he is. Don't worry about him all the time. The nurse is there ...

    Article : 155 words
  3. Did He Run?

    "What's your name?" asked the judge. "Well, judge, you honoh, evywhore Ah go they gives me a new name, but mab maiden name was Mose." ...

    Article : 130 words
  4. Over the 'Phone.

    "Are you there?" "Who are you, please?" "Watt." "What's your nanie?" ...

    Article : 72 words
  5. Just the Thing.

    Morning, noon and night, commercial travellers were calling on a harssed business man, until at last he did not know which way to turn to avoid them. ...

    Article : 135 words
  6. A Good Reason.

    A Scotsman went one evening to call upon an old friend, who received him in a rocking-chair. The visitor was surprised that his- host did not rise to greet him, ...

    Article : 210 words
  7. Irish Wit.

    Mr. W. J. Womersley, M.P. for Grimsby, j told a good story at a dinner in London of an Irish member who got over a little difficulty confronting him in the House ...

    Article : 128 words
  8. Saluting the Jury.

    A man who had never seen the inside of a law court until he was recently introduced as a witness in a case pending in one of the Scotch, courts,.on being sworn, ...

    Article : 131 words
  9. His Guiding Star.

    Jones had recently bought a secondhand car. "I understand that giving pet names to cars is the fashion just now," remark ...

    Article : 86 words
  10. Boarding-House Broodiings.

    There's always very little room where the "Room to Let" sign hangs out. Boarding-house tea is week tea—the leaves are apparently made to last a ...

    Article : 98 words
  11. Too True.

    It was obvious to the man who kept tile bird shop that his customer was not in the best of tempers. The disgruntled man entered and slam ...

    Article : 94 words
  12. Crash!

    He was irascible and obstinate, and he had ventured on the ice when commonsense should have warned bim against it. When the ice gave way and he found him ...

    Article : 84 words
  13. Not Far Enough.

    Bill Hopkins liad injured himself at work. He was a bricklayer's labourer, and, while handing up a hod lull of bricks, ho had the misfortune to fall, from the ...

    Article : 84 words
  14. Divorce Wanted.

    "Do yon want a divorce. Rastus?" "Yes, sui, jedge, yo-honah-Ah she'ly docs." "What's the trouble?" ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 77 words
  15. It Pacified Her.

    "Oh, George," wailed the rou tig woman, "l have found out that you were devoted to no fewer than five gills before you finally proposed to me. How do I ...

    Article : 85 words
  16. A True Scot.

    An Aberdonian on a visit to Loudon noticed outside a house a brass plate which stated that the tenant was a professor of economics who gave lectures ...

    Article : 102 words
  17. Enquiry Adjourned.

    "Did you ever stop to think' said the village shopkeeper recently as he measured about half a peck of potatoes, "that these potatoes contain sugar, water, and starch? ...

    Article : 71 words
  18. Cheap at That.

    One night an hotel truest eallel up to the assistant, and in an angry voice said: "There are a couple of mice fighting up ...

    Article : 64 words
  19. Company's Guarantee

    An old Indy was greatly frightened wlien the tram thundered into the Severn tunnel "Do you think," she asked the ticket ...

    Article : 56 words
  20. Just So..

    Hunter: "And I was in tiio middle of the jungle when suddenly I saw a tribe of savages charging down on mo." Friend: "Goodness And what did yon ...

    Article : 55 words
  21. Next Best Thing.

    Hotel Proprietor (to new boy)—"Did you wake up No. 44?" Boy—"No sir; couldn't wake him up, sir, but I did the nearest I could, sir." ...

    Article : 38 words
  22. Ambiguous.

    "Johnny, run down stairs and tell Mrs. Smith-shu's at the dom-that I'm out." "Hello. Mrs. Smith! Mother's out." said Johnny. ...

    Article : 48 words
  23. Patented.

    Boots-"I can't do 'cm no helter, sir, iniiess I blacks 'em." The Nut-"Black 'em.. What the doocc next? They're patents." ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 91 words
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