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  2. PERSONIFIED LAZINESS.

    "I never hear laziness discussed," said [?] artist," but I think of old man Crawford, who used to keep an inn on the beach, and a lot of as fallows were in the habit of running down ...

    Article : 223 words
  3. Flotsam and Jetsam

    I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me, And what can be the use of him is more than I can see. He is very, very like me, from the heels up to the ...

    Article : 148 words
  4. QUID PRO HOG.

    A farmer whose hog was killed by a train wrote the company's claim agent for a settlement. He penned his communication thus: My razorback strolled down your track a week ago ...

    Article : 128 words
  5. HE WAS WOUND UP HIMSELF.

    "Serious things make me want to laugh sometimes," remarked a gen[?al elderly clergyman, "and I simply cannot help the feeling, although, of course, I restrain the ...

    Article : 299 words
  6. A POSER.

    A clever woman—she came from Boston—some time ago made a great stir with her spiritualist se[?]es. She discovered lost goods and found strayed friends, called up spirits, ...

    Article : 122 words
  7. WORSE AND WORSE.

    Towne: "My wife used to get nervous every time she heard a noise downstairs, but I assured her that It couldn't be burglars, because they're always careful not to make ...

    Article : 52 words
  8. ADAPTED.

    An automobilist had strayed out of his course and taken a cross road into a remote farming district. After awhile his "Red Devil" went whistling past a wheat field. Near the fence ...

    Article : 172 words
  9. PROPER DRESS FOR A GROOM.

    One of the largest ready-made clothing houses in the city received not long ago from the remote South-west a latter, the substance of which was: ...

    Article : 125 words
  10. RULES FOR SEASIDE RESORTS.

    Engagements made on these promises are not binding after two weeks. Married men without their wires will please [?]al their identity. ...

    Article : 56 words
  11. FACTS AND FANCIES.

    A little nonsense now and then Is relished by the wisest men.—HUDIBRAS. Diner: "Isn't that Rather a smalt steak?" Walter: "Yes, sir; but you'll ...

    Article : 720 words
  12. A NEAT RETORT.

    Prompted by the testing that it was his duty, a well-known Bishop [?] [?] with tea of his clergy for attending the most of a local hunt. ...

    Article : 117 words
  13. A WOMAN DEPOSITOR.

    "one day during the busy Christmas [?]. when every moment was precious," said a bank teller, "a woman presented her passbook and asked to have her money, which ...

    Article : 203 words
  14. MARK TWAIN'S "HISTORY."

    "My, you ought to seen old Henry the Eighth when he was in bloom. He was a blossom. He used to marry a new wife every day, and chop off her head next morning. And ...

    Article : 269 words
  15. THE ADMIRAL'S STORY.

    Admiral Jou[?] who is the [?] old [?] dog of all the retired officers of the American navy, tails an amusing story of his early days as a cadet. ...

    Article : 163 words
  16. AN EASY VICTIM.

    "I've bean thrown down several times in my life, said the traveller when talking about the crafty ways of outsiders "but it was a little confidence game that humiliated me ...

    Article : 374 words
  17. A FABLE OF THE DROUGHT.

    During a season of drought the Dusks in a certain pond raised a great quacking, and gathered together to discuss the fact that the water was getting low and the time must ...

    Article : 317 words
  18. HE WAS ANOTHER.

    "Yes, we get a kicker here-occasionally," replied a northern summer resort landlord to a guest's inquiry," bat unless he's a chronic one I can generally locate him and send him ...

    Article : 302 words
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