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  2. WIT AND HUMOR.

    Post: That man down in the arbor making love is a divinity student. Parker: Yes, I know; bnt who is the divinity? Mrs. Bimbelstein: Jacob, here vos leetle Isaac's ...

    Article : 1,091 words
  3. JAUK'S LITTLE RUSE

    Some years ago a seaman belonging to the Royal navy, who had just returned from abroad, and whose ship was moored alonside of Portsmouth dockyard, conveived a plan to smuggle some ...

    Article : 208 words
  4. ONE GLEAM OF SUNSHINE.

    His play is a rank failure. It is a frost and a fizzle--and he knows it. The dramatist bows his head upon his hands and refuses to be comforted, for it is his first ...

    Article : 104 words
  5. ADVICE THEY HEED.

    "Yes; I'm going abroad at once. I gotta go." "Oh, you mustn't let the doctors scare you." "I got this from a lawyer." ...

    Article : 26 words
  6. TRUE HEROISM.

    Said She: You say you love me, but are you willing to face danger in order to prove it ? Said He; Certainly, I am willing to marry you. ...

    Article : 32 words
  7. MUCH MORE RELIABLE.

    "I will marry you, Leonora. I call all you stars to witness." "I'd rather prefer yo'd call my big brother to witness." ...

    Article : 26 words
  8. FINDING A LOST SOVEREIGN.

    "Look here, mister Did you drop this here sovereign? The party addressed turned around and looked at the bootblack, as the latter held out a sovereign ...

    Article : 227 words
  9. ON THE OUTSKIRTS.

    Traveller: The 9.15 train is very late again this morning, porter. Porter: It is a bit behind, sir, but we're exceptin' it every hour now. ...

    Article : 29 words
  10. THE HOLIDAY ELEMENT.

    Wife: Don't yon think, James, that it's time we began to put by for a rainy day? Hubby: Yes, my darling, I certainly think we might begin to save up for the holidays. ...

    Article : 36 words
  11. THE AMERICAN NAVY IN THE PACIFIC.

    "I see," said Mr. Hennessey, "we're goin' to sind the navy to the Passyflc." "I see we're not too," said Mr. Dooley. "There's two sides to iv ry question, an' in Washington ...

    Article : 507 words
  12. A DOUBTFUL WELCOME AWAITING.

    Wife (on her return home): Have you noticed that my husband missed me very much while I was away, Liese? Maid: Well, I didn't notice it so much at ...

    Article : 42 words
  13. SCHOLARSHIP.

    Genial Clergyman (visiting the village school): Well, my little man, what do you do in school all day? The Most Promising Pupil: I wait till it's time ...

    Article : 32 words
  14. JUST WHAT HE MEANT.

    Anxious Mother: Do you think that young man who has been calling on you for some time means business? Pretty Daughter: I'm sure he does. Every time ...

    Article : 44 words
  15. NOT A PROFESSION.

    Representative Lorimer, of Chicago, who is a great walker, was recently out for a tramp along tlie conduit road leading from Washington, when, after going a few miles, he sat down to rest. ...

    Article : 155 words
  16. A HUSBAND'S ' ULTIMATUM"

    There were some quaint clauses in an "ultimatum" sent by a Birmingham man to his wife, who applied to the local bench for a summons for threats against her husband. The "ultimatum," ...

    Article : 162 words
  17. CADDIES' RELIGIOUS SCRUPLES.

    A lady and a friend were playing golf on a Sunday on a Scottish course. ''Eventually we arrived at the ninth green and there we were rather started to see ' a ...

    Article : 152 words
  18. Advertising

    {No abstract available}

    Advertising : 44 words
  19. BEAT HIM ONE WAY.

    As Mark Twain and a friend were chatting at the summer house of the humorist, Quarry Farm, near Elmira. New York, the conversation turned to the wealth of John D. Rockefeller. ...

    Article : 82 words
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