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  2. NEW YEAR'S DAY, 2001.

    The last stroke of midnight has echoed into silence. December 31st 2000, has rolled away into the mist of the vanished ages. The twenty first century has dawned upon ...

    Article : 863 words
  3. A CHRISTMAS METEORITE.

    It is a poor sort of Christmastide which does not produce at least one meteorite. In West Essex there is a little village called Great Parndon, which is near nowhere ...

    Article : 448 words
  4. A TALE OF WOE.

    "Yes," said the lamliard, "we do have funny experiences occantenally in the hotel business. of course, I don't refer to the guests who blow out the gas or want to ...

    Article : 701 words
  5. A YOUNG ISHMAELITE.

    Had you asked him his name he would have told you that it was "Jed, Jes' Jed, an unthin' else," and had you pressed yourinquiries further you would have learned, had he been in a ...

    Article : 3,124 words
  6. COMMON THINGS.

    On a recent visit of inspection, a Government inspector of schools asked a number of questions of the pubils about the little things in the world ...

    Article : 148 words
  7. WHAT THE IRISHMAN SAID.

    In court a man was on trial who could speak nothing bat Irish, and an interpreter was called and duly sworn. The prisoner at once asked him some ...

    Article : 160 words
  8. DOCTOR JOHNSON AND WOMEN.

    A recent study, by Mr. W. H. Craig, of Doctor Johnson and his opinion of women, gives some very pertinent anecdotes of his uncompromising bluntness toward them. He was ...

    Article : 358 words
  9. SUITING BOTH PARTIES.

    Poor Wife (to husband whose loud snoring keens lier awake): Charlie, Charlie, do stop tutoring. Turn over on your side." (Nudges him.) ...

    Article : 79 words
  10. THE CHINAMAN AND THE REPORTER.

    Here is a story from the "Ohio Monthly" which humorously illustrates the way in which large numbers of people are in the habit of thinking of the Chinese, as if they ...

    Article : 255 words
  11. WHY

    Brown: I say, old man, what individual stands the best chance of winning the two novels offered by "Woman?" Smith: Well. I should say a weaver ...

    Article : 78 words
  12. HER STANDARD.

    "Did be seem pleaded to bars you ask for his daughter's band?" "He's a man who closely conceals his feelings." ...

    Article : 165 words
  13. MOTHER WAS PACKING.

    A friend called on a worthy divine who [?] been offered [?] daughter of the house met him at the door. ...

    Article : 60 words
  14. SLIGHTING THE WAITER.

    It was at a railway refreshment-room. The passenger was hungry and in a hurry. "Please pass me them pertsters, mister," he said, addressing an elegant gentleman who ...

    Article : 151 words
  15. JOURNALISTIC AMENITIES.

    The "Arizona Kicker" contains the following: "All car readers will bear witness to the fact that we have exercised the greatest palien[?] in bearing the sluts and taunts of our esteemed ...

    Article : 332 words
  16. ILL-LUCK OF PEACOCK'S FEATHERS.

    There ia at least one house in London where you will as soon see a python as a praecek's feather, says the "Onlooker." The drawing-room was once decorated with a ...

    Article : 155 words
  17. IT DIDN'T WORK.

    Father: Tommie, I hope you apologised nicely for in tiding on that gentleman's foot. Tommie: Oh, yes, and be gave me ...

    Article : 53 words
  18. WHY IT WAS WANTED.

    A middle-aged woman called at a druggist's shop the other evening, and asked for morphine, and the assistant replied to her request with ...

    Article : 120 words
  19. THE BOYS MISTAKE.

    A bishop staying in a country hotel wished to be called early. The land-lord gave the pane-boy strict orders to address him as "My Lord." The boy ...

    Article : 52 words
  20. A BAD CUSTOMER.

    A good story is told of a British colonel who possessed a prodigious appetite. When in Wales, he went on a walking tour, and stopped for a raid-day meal at a village inn. ...

    Article : 143 words
  21. INSECTS OF THE SEA.

    A few extracts from a contribution to the January number of "Knowledge" by Mr. G. H. Carpenter, B.Sc., will show how engrossing is the study of the insect fauns of ...

    Article : 332 words
  22. HER DEFINITION.

    A little girl was asked by an artist to define drawing and replied:— "Oh, drawing is thinking and then marking round the think." ...

    Article : 49 words
  23. HIS IDEA OF WORK.

    In a small village in Kent lived a farmer who has two sons—the elder, Jerry, an industrious and hard-working boy; the younger, Willie, just as idle. His father, wishing to ...

    Article : 117 words
  24. A BAPTISMAL NOTICE.

    A clergyman having two churches, one at each end of straggling parish, was accustomed to conduct baptisms at each church alternate Sundays. One Sunday ...

    Article : 46 words
  25. HOW HE GUESSED.

    She whispered in the honeymoon, "How coot you were when you proposed! And I, poor thing, thought I should swoon— You noticed bow my eyes were closed?" ...

    Article : 119 words
  26. TO MAINTAIN A PRINCIPLE.

    There is probably not another business firm in the world, that anaually sacrifices thousands, simply to maintain a principle, as Whitall, Tatom & Co., the Quaker glass manufacturers ...

    Article : 300 words
  27. THEY WERE MARRIED.

    Millie: Algy, dear, I dreamed last night you had given me such a lovely bracelet fora birthday present." Algy: Did you? Then you'd better go ...

    Article : 42 words
  28. TAKEN DOWN A PEG.

    Gusher: My wife has promised to wait for me at the site of Heaven, if she ia the first to go. Flasher.—Tutt[?]ut! You shouldn't be so ...

    Article : 198 words
  29. WHAT DID HE MEAN

    A gentleman hiving a book unit him to criticise, replied in the following terms:— "Thank yon very much for year book. ...

    Article : 93 words
  30. HE KNEW.

    She was rather proud of ber waist, and intimated that he couldn't guess the measure of it. "I can give it within the fraction of an ...

    Article : 121 words
  31. A GOOD EXCUSE.

    "Now, madam." mid the crotchety Judge, who had been snooped by the digression of previous female witnesses, "we want no hearsay evidence. Tell only what you know. ...

    Article : 58 words
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