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  2. He Must Have Known

    BILLY: "Huh! I bet you you didn't have a good time at your birthday party yesterday." Willie: "I bet I did." Billy: "Then why ain't you sick to-day?'" ...

    Article : 33 words
  3. In Lighter Vein

    NEWER people in Sydney would be shot if more criminals were shot in. "The whole system of democratic government is on its trail."—Extract from news paragraph. ...

    Article : 240 words
  4. Obliging

    WHEN Sarah presented a cheque at the Woop Woop branch of the bank the teller examined it and then handed it back to her. "That is a crossed cheque, madam," he explained. ...

    Article : 52 words
  5. Modern Interpretation

    "WHY do you call your wife an angel?" "Because she's always ready to fly off, she's continually harping, and she hasn't an earthly thing to wear." ...

    Article : 29 words
  6. Which Way?

    "YOUR mother-in-law is dangerously ill," the doctor gravely explained to Hinks; "in fact, I can say that she is at death's door." "Oh, well, doctor," said Hinks, "we can do no more ...

    Article : 53 words
  7. Nothing!

    "THE last time I was in camp," said Private Tomkins, "the temperatures on three successive nights dropped to zero." "That's nothing," snorted an old soldier. ...

    Article : 43 words
  8. Anti-Noise Campaign

    DAD had been used to the quiet of the out-back, where in the early hours of the morning there was nothing at all to disturb his peaceful slumber unless it was a jackass or two greeting the first glimpse ...

    Article : 394 words
  9. Ignorance

    "MY," said Mrs. Knowall, "the ignorance of some people! There's Mrs. Knownothing. She said as how Mrs. Talktown was a perfect paragram of virtue, an' me knowin' she should have said parallelogram." ...

    Article : 33 words
  10. The Advice

    TENANT: "I moved into that house of yours the other week and I find it full of cockroaches. What shall I do?" Agent: "Save them for a time, and if the former ...

    Article : 49 words
  11. Not Really Innocent

    THE sweet young flapper was crying and holding her face. A middle-aged woman approached and asked: "What, is the matter? Are you, in pain?" "Yes," replied the girl. "Two young men over there ...

    Article : 89 words
  12. Strange!

    SERGEANT BUZZ: "My wife doesn't understand me. Does yours?" Constable Enoo: "I don't know. I've never heard her even mention your name." ...

    Article : 25 words
  13. New Words

    SNAGGS, our best ledger-keeper, made a hobby of going through the dictionary and finding new words to add to his vocabulary. There were times, however, when he used the words in the wrong NAVY WEEK. Chatty Visitor (to Officer of the Watch): "And which do you like best, young man—steamers ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 165 words
  14. Doubly Blind

    TEACHER: "In what dramatic way did Nelson disregard the signal from the flagship to cease fire?" Pupil: "He put the compass to his blind eye and said, 'I cannot see the enemy.'" ...

    Article : 37 words
  15. Question of Tense

    FATHER: "The sentence, 'I had a lot of money,' is in the past tense. Now, Harry, what tense would you say 'I have a lot of money' is in?" ...

    Article : 40 words
  16. Horse and Cart

    TWO diggers were yarning as they passed the time away in the little estaminet in France. "They reckon, Blue, that the poor Frenchies in Paris are eatin' 'orse flesh in the ...

    Article : 73 words
  17. Pro Rata

    McEXTRAVAGANCE was in a charitable frame of mind. He saw a man with a placard dangling on his soupstained shirt. It read: "Help the blind ...

    Article : 65 words
  18. All Credit to Her

    IT was the day after the return from the honeymoon and the young bride was out shopping for the first time. Her George would appreciate poultry for ...

    Article : 77 words
  19. Just the Same

    THE criminal was up before the Court on the same minor charge that he had been charged with on a dozen previous occasions. The same magistrate ...

    Article : 57 words
  20. Wasting Nothing

    "WHEN are you thinking of getting married, Dave?" Dad asked his son one evening. "Oh, I dunno, Dad. Why?" Dave ...

    Article : 90 words
  21. Enterprise

    THE whole Smith family was busily engaged wrapping old newspapers, rubbish, etc., in neat brown paper packages when a friend arrived. ...

    Article : 68 words
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