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  2. A PAGE OF FUN [?] The Wounded Wasp.

    The Scoutmaster was teaching his troop to be kind to animals. Suddenly one of the listeners jumped up with a yell and then burst into tears. ...

    Article : 91 words
  3. Vin Decollete.

    The wealthy baronet had not always been wealthy, neither had he always been a baronet, and, for that reason, he was prone to keep rather a sharp eye on his ...

    Article : 113 words
  4. No title

    Lady: "I am sorry to say that the cook you tent me came home intoxicated twice in the month." Manageress of Servants' Registry. "Excuse me, madam, but we never listen to stories of that kind." From London "Punch," by special arrangement with the proprietors. ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 96 words
  5. Considerate Convict.

    Weary Walter was up before the magistrate once again. This time he had been found guilty of theft, and the law had sentenced him to two months in prison. ...

    Article : 102 words
  6. His Mistake.

    A visitor to the new Madame Tussaud's turned to an attendant just inside the door. "Could you direct me to the Chamber ...

    Article : 91 words
  7. The Name's Value.

    The vicar was paying a visit to the homes of his poorer parishioners, and in the house of a certain costermo[?]ger he asked many questions about the family. ...

    Article : 104 words
  8. To Forgetfulness a Prey.

    The return to the home town of the "local boy" who has made his fortune in the city is not always the great event it should be. A young banker, who, after 10 ...

    Article : 106 words
  9. Not in Stock.

    A young lady wanting a canine pet went to a dealer and said: "I want one of those dogs about so high and about so long. A sort of greyhound, but it isn't quite, ...

    Article : 73 words
  10. The Swallower.

    Unable Seaman.—"When I came round again the surgeon 'e says to me, 'I'm blooming sorry, mate, I don't know what I was thinking about,' he says, 'but there's ...

    Article : 77 words
  11. What Was Wrong?

    A man purchased a cheap car, and, finding it was not quite up to specifications, took it back to the works for examination. ...

    Article : 54 words
  12. No Objection.

    There was no doubt the fair motorist was driving her powerful car through the village street dangerously and the local constable stopped her. "You've bin ...

    Article : 60 words
  13. A Kind Offer.

    A gang of labourers were at work on a new road, but one of them lacked enthusiasm for his job, and made very little attempt to work. ...

    Article : 71 words
  14. Too Much Soap.

    Mother: I wish you would go on an errand for me. Small Son: My leg aches awful. "Too bad. I want you to go to old ...

    Article : 65 words
  15. Why It Stood.

    Badly-informed Guide: "Ladies and gentlemen, on yo—er—r right you see a monument erected last year to a noble cause." ...

    Article : 43 words
  16. Potted Philosophy.

    Some are born good and others make good. When a man and his wife are of one mind it's not hard to guess what mind. ...

    Article : 48 words
  17. The Next Thing.

    The old general was walking down the street, when he was stopped by a beggar. "Don't refuse a trifle," said the latter. "I'm an old soldier." ...

    Article : 60 words
  18. Catty.

    Muriel met Mabel one afternoon. "By the way." Mabel remarked, "both Clarence and Claude proposed to me last night and—" ...

    Article : 45 words
  19. Too Bad.

    She (at beach): "It's awful to meet one of the boys you were engaged to last summer." Her Friend: "It must be." ...

    Article : 47 words
  20. All Below.

    "Have you ever seen worse weather than this. Mister Sailor?" asked the nervous lady passenger of the deck hand. "Take a word from an old salt, missus," ...

    Article : 52 words
  21. Sleepy Students.

    Sike Prof.: "I am dismissing you ten minutes earlier. Try not to wake the other class." ...

    Article : 18 words
  22. Moonshine.

    Heard on the 'bus: "Bill, you're a builder; what is it that keeps the moon from falling?" "Dunno, old sport, unless it is the ...

    Article : 27 words
  23. A Long Spring.

    Percival: "After all, our common ancestors sprang from an ourang-outang." Freddie (frivolously): "Well, old top, any sensible chappie would." ...

    Article : 23 words
  24. Her First Thought.

    Amberson: "When you fell off the seaf-fold, and your wife got word that you were gravely injured, how was she taking it when they took you home?" ...

    Article : 51 words
  25. A Good Proposition.

    That impertinent chap La Posche has just offered me twenty pounds to resign my membership of the club. What would you advise me to do? ...

    Article : 34 words
  26. Why He Left Home.

    "What caused your husband to leave home?" "I haven't the least idea. He just packed up and left the morning after my mother ...

    Article : 38 words
  27. His Only Fear.

    Interviewer: "Aren't you sometimes frightened when vou look down at the street below you?" Steeplejack: "Yes. Only yesterday I ...

    Article : 35 words
  28. Laughter in Court.

    "Sir," said the judge to the young man —defendant in a breach of promise suit —"you will please discontinue your joking remarks during the remainder of this ...

    Article : 43 words
  29. She Knew.

    Visitor: "No letter for me? That's strange!" Village Postmistress (severely): "Nothing strange about it, young man; you ...

    Article : 25 words
  30. Just Like Mother.

    Young Girl: "Mother, what did you do when a boy first kissed you?" Mother: "Never mind." Young Girl (later): "I did the same ...

    Article : 29 words
  31. In-dole-ence.

    Wife: "You are nothing but a lazy ne'er-do-well." Husband: "Ho, am I? I like that! And who earns the unemployment pay ...

    Article : 28 words
  32. She Earned It.

    A musical comedy actress sends us the following tribute which she has received: —"Dear Miss X.—Please send me your autograph; when you went off the stage ...

    Article : 37 words
  33. The Alternative.

    "Doesn't Joe ever get tired of his wife's continued sulkiness?" "I think not. He says when she's good-natured she sings." ...

    Article : 23 words
  34. Her Refusals.

    Clara: You may not believe it. but I said "No" to seven different men during the summer. Maude: Oh, I don't doubt it. What ...

    Article : 29 words
  35. Meaty.

    A prominent vegetarian says that those who eat meat will live to rue it. Another way of telling us that the habit is meet for repentance. ...

    Article : 27 words
  36. Terrible!

    The Major: "And there we stood. Miss Browne, in the heart of the jungle—that huge panther and I. barely ten paces apart, each staring into the face of the other." ...

    Article : 46 words
  37. Only an Option.

    "Are you engaged to him?" "Yes," answered the prudent girl. "But I have requested time to verify reports on his title and fortune." ...

    Article : 37 words
  38. That Spoilt It.

    She was describing her rescue from drowning. "I kept on yelling," she exclaimed, "and would you believe it, the man who hoicked me out wasn't the one ...

    Article : 45 words
  39. Her Risk.

    He: "You're the first girl [?] ever kissed." She: "Well, that's a chance we girls have to take nowadays." ...

    Article : 21 words
  40. Low Down.

    "They charged me half a crown to have my hair shingled." "My dear, it wasn't worth a 'bob.'" ...

    Article : 20 words
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