"Have yer ever thought, Boss o' how many queer things happen about Xmas time?" "No," I answered drowsily ...
Article : 1,317 wordsMillionaire (to his daughter)—"Tell me, child—that young man who wants to marry you this Christmas, has he got any money?" ...
Article : 52 wordsThe rising [?]oon on the peaks was blending Her silver light with the sunset glow, When a [?]gmen came as the day was ending, Along a path rhst he seemed to know. ...
Article : 671 words"Alas," sighed the moody man, "there is no gladness for me in this joyous season." "Tut-tut!" said the optimist. ...
Article : 94 words"Now, ladies and gentlemen," said the conjurer at the Christmas entertainment, pointing to his magic cabinet, "I beg to call your attention to the great ...
Article : 135 wordsThe girl was attempting to dance with a fat man who couldn't. The fat man was a great bungler and he knew it. He gasped as they hoppled about. ...
Article : 76 wordsOne don't give much praise to potatoes, And it's quite an unusual thing To include them in poetical fancy, Or mention the blessings they bring. ...
Article : 294 wordsAn Irishman was on trial charged with assaulting a neighbour and fracturing his skull. During the trial several physicians testified that the man's skull was ...
Article : 82 wordsLittle Peter is a good boy, but he has the serious fault of being extremely forgetful. One day, after having gone on an errand, and forgotten what he was ...
Article : 86 wordsA kindly old gentleman who for many years ran a successful business not many miles from Edinburgh, was wont to be taken to task for his shabby clothes. ...
Article : 80 wordsThe reverend visitor was known to have no belief in ghosts, and his hostess had therefore no qualms about putting him to sleep in the haunted room. ...
Article : 218 wordsA well-known lecturer, whose speciality is ghosts, was thrilling his audience and making them feel decidedly creepy, as he discoursed eloquently on his uncanny ...
Article : 215 wordsPassenger (to railway guard): How far is Dublin from Cork? Guard: One hundred and sixty-five miles, sir. ...
Article : 85 wordsLittle Bob sat in the big arm-chair wearing his best suit and an uncomfortable look. He had been disturbed in a Christmas Eve raid on the pantry. ...
Article : 96 words"My darling," said a fond mother, who believed in appealing to children's tender feelings instead of punishing them, "if you are so naughty you will ...
Article : 108 wordsTwo policemen, Casey and (Murphy, while walking along the banks of river the other day, espied the body of a man floating in the water. They at ...
Article : 80 wordsCaptain de Broke (at the ball): Ivy, madam, in your hair? It's a charming idea; so thoughtful! Miss Goldie Methuselah: Are you so ...
Article : 73 wordsIt is a well-worn belief that a woman can never keep a secret. This only applies, however, to the less important events in her life. The secrets the average ...
Article : 115 wordsA young man named Older knew an old man named Younger. Old man Younger had a son younger than Older, and another Younger older. ...
Article : 88 wordsVisiting Friend (to the youngster): By Jove, what a remarkable likeness. Same features, same smile, and I've no doubt the same disposition, and mental calibre. ... [ILLUSTRATED]
Article : 41 wordsIt was the evening of Christmas Eve. A special constable approached the cyclist. "Sir," said he, "your beacon has ...
Article : 78 wordsBobbie had never seen a live sheep, but one of his most treasured toys was a little woolly lamb on wheels, which he drew all about the house and yard. Last ...
Article : 67 wordsYoung Tom Toote was spending Christmas in the country and had been invited to the beautiful home of a sweet young thing named Agnes. ...
Article : 122 wordsA churchwarden of a country church—a great smoker—was to be married to a nurse from the local hospital. A fortnight previously it was decided by the ...
Article : 114 wordsMother: "You were a long time in the conservatory with Mr. Willing last night, my child. What was going on?" Daughter: "Did you ever sit in the ...
Article : 51 wordsThey were two simple old Scotsmen, from some lone shieling by a sequestered Thrums. Yet they had heard of pirates and thought they saw from the holiday ...
Article : 88 wordsMamma: "Johnny, see that you give Ethel the lion's share of that orange." Johnny: "Yes, ma." Ethel: "Mamma, he hasn't given me ...
Article : 36 wordsHe: "In the street to-day a very handsome young lady smiled at me!" She: "Oh, I wouldn't feel badly about it. There are some men who look even ...
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Norseman Times (WA : 1898 - 1920), Sat 21 Dec 1918, Page 1
It's easy and takes two shakes of a lamb's tail!
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