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  2. The Humorous Side of Life.

    Hubby (painting window black, on ground, just below the bathroom window, to his wife, who threw a bucket of water out of that window and just missed him): "If I'come up ...

    Article : 47 words
  3. No title

    Station Sergeant: "What, back again?" Old Offender: "Yes, Sergeant. Any letters?" ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 11 words
  4. AS AGREED.

    "No," cried the irritated lady. "it doesn't fit as if he had been born to it—it doesn't fit at all, and I shall expect the money back." "But," replied Mr. Moses, "shelp me—" ...

    Article : 69 words
  5. NO DRAWBACK.

    "What!" said the indignant old gentleman, "you want to marry my daughter? Why it was only a few years ago that you were caddying for me." ...

    Article : 64 words
  6. FREQUENTLY.

    Bill: "These motor car drivers seem to think the ordinary pedestrians are beneath them." Bob: "Well, too often they are!" ...

    Article : 21 words
  7. SHABBY.

    He: "Do you think your father will object to my suit?" She: "I don't see why he should; he himself, wears one almost as bad." ...

    Article : 29 words
  8. BREAKING THE NEWS.

    Rich Uncle: "You might as well stop mooning about Miss Beauty. She hasn't been in love with you after all. She's been after the money she thought you would inherit from ...

    Article : 56 words
  9. THE POPULAR PART.

    "Well, Augustus," said a Dublin grocer to his apprentice, "you have been apprenticed now three months, and have seen the several departments of our trade. I wish to give you ...

    Article : 55 words
  10. ON THE SHELF.

    Husband: "My colleague is the most insatiable man I ever saw. He wants everything he sees." Wife: "Can't you introduce our daughter ...

    Article : 35 words
  11. A GOOD LIE.

    Punning repartee scintillated throughout a case at the County Court. Counsel: "I wish my client was here instead of, as I expect, lying in bed." ...

    Article : 41 words
  12. A BIT OF LUCK.

    Mrs. Brown called round to see Mrs. O'Flynn. "Don't your twins make a terrible noise at night?" she asked. ...

    Article : 41 words
  13. NO HELP NEEDED.

    Gipsy: "Cross my palm with silver, and I will find out your husband for you." Lady: "Thanks, awfully: but I find him out quite enough already." ...

    Article : 29 words
  14. IN YEARS TO COME.

    Kallow: "Yes; I'm trying to raise a moustache, and I'm wondering what color it'll be when it does come out." Miss Peppery: "Grey, I should say, at the ...

    Article : 39 words
  15. No title

    Mistress (whose new maid has not risen to expectations): "Don't forget to wind up the clock in the hall—it goes for fourteen days." Maid: "Does it? Well, I ain't staying more than a week, and I ain't going to do the next girl's work as well as me own." ... [ILLUSTRATED]

    Article : 50 words
  16. HIS WORK.

    A little boy, the son of a reporter, being asked what occupation his father pursued for a living, answered, with great simplicity: —"He is a dreadful accident maker, sir, for ...

    Article : 35 words
  17. BETTER DAYS.

    Bobby's father was telling him that he was a very lucky child. "When I was a little boy," he said, as mother helped Bobby to more jam. "my father only allowed me to" ...

    Article : 52 words
  18. A GOOD IDEA.

    Mistress (severely): "If this occurs again. Mary. I shall be forced to get another servant." Mary: "I wish you would, mum. There's ...

    Article : 37 words
  19. THE EXCEPTION.

    The famous actress was lunching with a noted cinema star. "Isn't it a pity," she remarked, "that all handsome men are so conceited." ...

    Article : 37 words
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