Queensland Figaro and Punch (Brisbane, Qld. : 1885 - 1889)(about) |
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Saturday 17 October 1885
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1 correction by flannel.flower - Show corrections
rounAboijt
They sa^ that I sometimes write things Which a want of a dignity flings,
At One thing or other,
Auld Cloot or his brother,
And they hold they're a right to considdy That I'm apt, sirs, at times, to >e giddy;
I'll admit the impeachment straight out, - I'm a giddy, old gay Roundabout,
Bat yourselves, I'll be bound,
Were you aye turning round— Round-about, as I am, you'd considdy You'd a sort- of a right to be giddy.
Thk libel action against the Daily Northern Standard, in which the Sub-collector of Custom?,! Mr. J. Hughes, is to appear as plaintiff, has been post poned in order to obtain the evidence of Carl Satini, who is at present in Europe. The case was fixed for the next sitting of the Circuit Court.
Something remarkably like what I suggested as possible, in last week's issue, has actually come to pass. I have since been informed that a little son of C. Williams, of Maryborough, was walking along Albert-street on his way home. He didn't reach home though, without assistance, as * his thigh was broken by a kick from a horse which was orazina
on the pavement. Later on, on the same day, another passer-by very narrowly escaped a similar injury, from the same direction, near the same place; but, perhaps, it was a police horse, and must be allowed to strew, fractures and death around, according to the dictates of its own sweet heel. A police horse up that way takes precedence of an ordinary Inspector of
Nuisances.
The nigs at Scrubby Creek (up Herberton way) have been resorting to stratagem recently, to gain access to the settlers' goods and chattels. They first steal axes and other tools, and plant tbein in the bush; then they watch. The settlers form parties and go on axe-hunting expeditions, and, having found the axes, or not, as the case may be, return and find that their humpies have been cleared of more valuable matters. Axes or no axes, they are generally minus rations and clothing.
A woman jumped overboard from the Archer during a recent trip from Cooktown to Townsville. She appeared to abandon her suicidal intention on finding herself in great Neptune's ocean, and struggled so desperately that she, was rescued. The vessel was immediately stopped, and a boat manned and lowered in a very creditably short time. The ducking had very little effect on her beyond sobering her, which she sadly required.
The same nigger who did honor to Sam Griffith by perching himself, all but naked, on the triumphal arch at Townsville, is again celebrating himself. He half-killed a woman with whom he was living, and she had to be sent to hospital. Notwithstanding, his political fame, he was proceeded against, but the case had to be postponed, pending the victim's recovery. P.M. Henry has already dealt with wife-beaters, and knows how to do it, and I don't think he will be influenced by any memory of this creature's eminence on the occasion alluded to.
On the Mossman River they go in for gymnastics somewhat unusual in the bqsh. A black boy employed by a selector up there was practising on the trapeze, but, after flying through the air with the greatest of ease, this daring young man fell from the flying trapeze to the ground ahd dislocated his spine. He is now perfectly at ease with his fathers.
Another set-to has taken place among the kanakas at Pleystowe Plantation, near Mackay. One was killed outright, and three others badly hurt. The one who inflicted the fatal wound is in custody.
A black tracker named Bromby, took French leave of the police camp at Townsville the other day, and gave Constable M'Clean, who was sent after him, a Jong chase before he caught him. Even then the nigger showed fight, when M'Lean floored and hand cuffed him. White played, and black was mated in
two moves.
The future capital of the North (need I say Towns ville ?) is going wonderfully ahead in anticipation. <r Coming events cast their shadows before." For instance, see this clipping :—" The Queen's Hotel changed hands recently, at a sum closely approaching i>14,000 cash, whilst .£10,000 was refused for the Excelsior Hotel, having 33ft. frontage to Flinders street, and £12,000 by Mr. John Hanran, for his 66ft. frontage to the sarnie street, a property which he purchased seven or eight years ago for J31050, and which three years back was only valued at ,£100 per foot. Suburban lands are realising proportionately high values." Stick to it, Johnny, it will be a perfect El Dorado after Billy Coote's arguments and letters
have taken their due effect.
Some of the competitors in the regatta last Satur day determined to make themselves conspicuous, if not by winning, by some means, anyhow. So they took their seats, sliding ones, adorned with white
bell-toppers.; They looked very nice, no doubt, but: neither climatic, athletic, nor aquatic.. Too much like a master-grocer making; up a small order while waiting for church time. Just to oblige a good and
regular customer, vou know.
A man calling himself William Anderson, was a stow-a-way on board the steamer South Australian, from Freemantle (W.A.) to Adelaide (S.A.J William stowed himself in a box measuring 3ft 6in by 2ft, by 2ft, so that his position during ihe trip was .more extra ordinary than comfortable, seeing that he stood, when unstowedjb^the Customs officers, 6ft. in height. He had some blibnits and an empty billy and an augur when found. fife-had kept the lid down by a string,
and had bored some holes for ventilation. He was much exhausted, and begged for water, neither of which circumstances^ wonder. He was given in charge. * -1^:
The Cam mo weal correspondent to the Carpentaria Times says the South Australian survey party has passed that place, and their depot is at Bocklands Station. He adds that " to see the team of camels come in and out is a sight.'' Quite possible, events to smell them coming and going would be an odour, perhaps, and. to hear them would be a noise. He says /' they Beem to travel over stones without an effort." What useful animals? Truly, ships cf the desert. By mafeing an effort they could probably travel over gum-trees. They are the only animals yet discovered that can even walk on a lawn without some sort of
effort.
At Mackay, on Sept. 30th, a Chinamanjjnamed Ah Chin, alias Mo Kum, was charged on remand with stealing a case of opium from the A. S. N. Co's store. The police failed to establish the charge, and, as barrister Komilly and solicitor F. H. Smith were ar rayed against Sub-Inspector Judge for the prosecu tion, the acquittal of Mo Hum was a certainty.
So now that Ah Chin is accused of no sin,
He can treat all his mates to a festive "chin
chin ;"
And, supposing that opium rests with this Mo
Kum,
He can fill all their pipes an assist 'em to smoke
'em.
The schoolmistress is abroad in Maryborough. She holds a weekly class for the culture of the minds and manners of the upper ten, and calls it "The Lady Principal's, At Home" 01 "Conversazione,"where the rough diamonds are polished without knowing it. The sweet influence of the two sisters Pleiads,who rule the social destinies of Maryborough, deserve a more grateful acknowledgment than the ribald gibes of the cynical colonist, who jeers at the adults who
attend the " Dame's School/' and refuses to join in the weekly seance at the tiny feet of the female
G-amaliels.
Aftee a long spell of drought, a pay-day has occurred at Emerald, on the Springsure railway line, which has resulted in considerable moisture, a severe soaking in some cases. A number of wet bulbs, ignoring Fahrenheit, got themselves up to fighting heat, and sailed into each other, until the police arrived and locked them up by degrees. They were variously dealt with. One of them, who was past blood heat, and savagely attacked a constable, was remanded for eight days.
A number of larrikins left Brisbane last week in search of fresher fields and pastures new. They lit upon Toowoomba as a trial ground, but one of them at least was wofully disappointed. Toowoomba was even worse than Brislane in its severity. They raised a disturbance in Ruthven-street, and one of I their number was arrested. His mates attempted a I resfeue and handled the police very roughly, but they
stuck to tlieir man, and secured one of the would-be rescuers. The latter was fined J65 for interfering, JB5 each for assault charges, and <£3 10s. for damages to uniform j ,£18 10 in all, which will considerably lower his estimation of Toowoomba as a theatre for Sunday larrikin performances. ■ "
The Cairns Post thinks "It is a matter of some surprise and much regret that Admiral Tryon did not call at the best harbor north of Sydney." But why should the Admiral call at Mourilyan, except to see Waldegrave Thompson's reef, and why should the Post regret his passing that harbor. Surely the Post can't suppose that Cairns harbor comes up to Mourilyan, whose wharf accommodates 1200-ton ships loaded with machinery.
Business people, and others who receive money, should be careful to affifc duty stamps to the receipts they give; themselves, before parting with them. Timothy M'Cauley was proceeded against the other day for giving an unstamped receipt for £2 to one William Burkin. It transpired that' Timothy had met'Burkin out of town late in the evening, and had handed him a stamp, which he promised to affix, but forgot to do so. The Bench, under the circumstances, inflicted the nominal fine of one farthing, but the warning is worth accepting, nevertheless. The Revenue Department, by Mr. Sheridan, prosecuted.
The tobacconist shop of W. Lewis, Brisbane-street, Ipswich, afforded material for a cheap smoke on Sunday evening last. A. broken pane in a French light door was taken advantage of and an entrance effected. On Monday morning, Lewis missed pipes, tobacco, knives, and cigars to the value of -£4.
—- — ■
Kenneth Ixlobisok, lately of Boondooma, is still lai4 up with his old indisposition, and is now under the'capable medical treatment of Dr. Win. Howlin, in the Dalby Hospital. Under that eminent medico's care, Morison tells me {in a casual letter he has scribbled) he is making a howlin' progress towards recovery, and hopes soon to be thoroughly restored to his former vigour. Kenneth seems, from ail accounts, to be still cultivating his literary propen sities, and his general style is as crisp and quaintly turned as ever. ■ Now is the time for Kenneth to try his hand at some opusynagms.
For when the body resteth, Kenneth,
The mind it planneth; the hand, it penneth.
Richard Tregaskis, of Charters Towers, has managed to complete his contemplated design of euchring the old mining monopoly that cornered a good deal of business in the Towers. Dick has obtained an order in the Warden's Court for regis tration of the claim he pegged out at the School of Arts Reserve, on condition that he paid <£500 com pensation for the surface rights. Riehard has paid the money and is now the owner of the claim. The committee and members of the Towers School of Arts are very well pleased at the result, which is also popular on the field. Ninety per cent of the community there only differ with the other ten per cent, iii thinking the amount of compensation too large—considering the fact that the ground was
reserved nine years ago, has never been used tor building and is now vacant, while the School of Arts has been erected on other ground. This means the break-up of the Day Dawn Block monopoly,, the em ployment of a large number of men, and the future output of much larger returns of gold. Tregaskis's luck is in again, and he will soon erect another pile. Richard is himself again.
The Rev. S. C. Anderson is now in Brisbane gaol, where he has to remain for a month. Ue had found shoe-blacking a non-paying occupation and took to begging again, combined with preaching, and im portuning of ladies in the streets. No more of his reverence for the present.
An old friend has turned up in his ever-exuberant chai'acteristic form. He is no less than Michael Ready (one time J.P.), of Mackay. He was sum moned on Sept. 17th by one, William Titley, mariner, for obscene language. From the evidence, it would seem that Mick's domestic existence is not a continued bed of roses. At any rate, he publicly accused his own wife and Mrs. Titley of not being angels of light. Titley naturally objected, and sought the assistance of the law. Hence the* prose cution. Ready was fined 4>3 14s. 6d., and costs to the tune of £1 5s. 6d.; in default, 14 days' imprison ment. I have not the -slightest doubt he paid the fine, because he has hardly had time to spend the thousands he didn't get ^in his verdict for libel against Figaro.