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I HEW COmUNMERTS.

TEN APIECE FOE MODEL HUS

BANDS AND WIVES.

FOR A MARRIED WOMAN.

I.-Thou shalt not nag.

II--Thou shalt keep thy temper to thyself.

I1T.-Thou shalt not bore thy hus

band.

IV.-Remember that thou keep unholy his many soelcs. Six days shalt thou frivol anil do all the things thou lovest to do, but, on the seventh-think! Be member his linen, to see that it is spot

less. Provide thou the extra stiul for

the emergency that will come, and watch lest the suit that hath been pres

sed hi not returned to its accustomed . nail, as it will-lie the one he asketh for.

V.-Honour thy wife, and all her praise may be long in the land .

VI.-Thou shalt not ask him any questions, neither in the morning, nor at the noonday hour, nor at night; for whatsoever a man wanteth thee to know

that will ho tell thee unsolicited, and a question mark is a hook that eatcheth

who knows what.

VJI.-Thou shalt^not complain; verily a complaining woman is worse than a shoe that pinchetli.

VIJI.-Thou shalt not steel thy heart against his hobbies.

IX.-Thou shalt obey him-some times; uncertainty hath charm when

minds are masculine.

X.-Thou shalt be fresh and sweet, and dainty as a shower bouquet. For lingerie is more to be desired than rubies, and a good cook above govern

ment boiidsl

7"f FOR A MARRIED MAN.

I.-Thou -shalt keep thy past unto thyself. This is the first and great

commandment.

31.-Thou shalt not scoff.

ITT.-Thou shalt be a careful kisser.

IV.-Remember that thou keep holy

thy marriage vows. Six day shalt thou . vaguely dream of might have beens, but 011 the seventh-wake! Remember thy wife, to sing her praises. Give her freely of thy time and wit, for a dull husband is a discouragement to the gods, and a clever one-almost human.

V.-Honour thy wife/i, and all her bills, that thy days may be long in tho

land ....

V L-Remember thy mother-in-law, to keep her guessing, for a wise mother in-law lovel.h a cheerful liar, and a good

excuse is better than none.

V1T.-Thou shalt not steal a march unto thy club.

VIII.-Thou shalt not toy with dan ger, though verily a live impulse has low voltage domestic boredom beaten to a fraz/.le.

IX.-Thou shalt choose thy brand of tobacco, likewise thy experience, ac cording to thine income.

X.-Thou shalt bo a man; depend able as thy best investment; thorough bred as a racer, mellow as old wine, con stant as thy club dues; then of a surety will favour cling to theo as

lichen to an old oak.

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